It is almost normal, while your break up is still fresh, for you to want to do things that may only end up making your case even worse. Anyone who’s been there before will tell you it’s not an easy road to tread when you suddenly and quite unexpectedly find yourself single. For most ladies, locking yourself up in a room and watching sad movies that would make you cry all day seem like the perfect remedy. For men, its usually about hitting the bottles and spending a lot of time at the bar, downing your pains. In the end, you are only hurting yourself more. Here are eight things you should avoid doing if yo suddenly find yourself single again.
*Don’t panic. Do not start asking, who’s going to love me now? Who’s going to be calling me up on the phone and sending me lovely messages every minute? Will i ever love again? It is natural for these questions to come up, but you must remember, your break-up must be allowed to break you. Allow yourself experience the pain of your loss then slowly begin to recover from it all. After all, you are an adorable woman and you will surely find your own man.
*Don’t blame yourself. It takes two to make a relationship work, so blaming yourself alone for whatever happened is being unfair to yourself. And you do not need to blame your ex either, it will only make you become vengeful and resentful, which isn’t what you need right now. What you need to do is move on and be happy again so the opposite sex can find you attractive.
*Spending too much time alone is unhealthy. When you do this, you only end up dwelling too much on the past and wishing you could turn back the hands of time. Don’t lock up yourself indoors, go out with friends and have fun and you might just find yourself something to cheer you up.
*Stop talking about your ex too much. This will only sadden you the more. And once your friends find that whenever they are around you, all you ever talk about is your ex and then you end up crying. They may start avoiding you and might not ask you to hang out with them knowing you could bore them again with rants about your ex.
*Holding onto your ex’s things might not be such a good idea. You may feel that holding onto his shirts that he left with you or wearing his boxers makes you feel connected to him again, truth is it won’t do you any good. So, you need to decide if you still need those things or you want to get rid of them.
*Stalking him online is a bad idea. Sure, most of us, men and women are guilty of this. We’re always curious to find out how our ex is taking the break-up. It could shatter you to find that while you’re still badly hurting and wishing things could return back to the way they were, your ex has moved on and is already flaunting his or her new boo on facebook, instagram, etc.
Lashing out at our ex on social media is also a common sight. But it is absolutely unnecessary. You think its a good way to express your grievances and attract sympathy from people, but it is even worse that you’re putting your private matters out there in the open. In the end, it would not help your case.
*Don’t use someone else to get at your ex. A lot of us look to find an escape out of our misery and think falling for the next guy or girl that comes along will solve the problem, especially as you feel certain it would make your ex jealous. Often always, this seldom works out fine. Its nothing but a rebounds move destined to fail even before it takes off.